My Second Favorite Murder Ballad

"Knoxville Girl" by The Singing Hall Sisters

The Baby

Just rent it.

Rebus and a Haircut = Two Bits

Rudy is an ex-boxer. He and his son run this honest-to-goodness actual barbershop in Glendale. Not a barbershop themed unisex hair salon, a Barbershop. With boxing gloves on the wall and girlie mags in the racks. And there's a rebus on the back of his business card. A rebus for chrissake!!

A haircut will run you fellas a mere 15 bucks. A straight razor shave with hot towels and whatever that smelly stuff is they put on your face afterward: 15 bucks. I wonder if they do legs...

Rebus solution:

I Heart Healers

While cleaning out a closet, I found this old newspaper clipping of the late Dr. Velma Jaggers from 1994. I spent Christmas morning that year at her Universal World Church spectacular. Actually, it was more than spectacular. It was, "THE MOST INCREDIBLY MAGNIFICENT CHRISTMAS EVER SEEN BY ANYONE! THE MOST FANTASTIC - MAGNIFICENT - SPLENDIFEROUSLY BEAUTIFUL EVENT IN 6000 YEARS!!" Not only that, but Miss Velma even healed me with her special magic God oil. (I faked a slight limp in case she asked what my problem was.) Oddly, for the rest of the day my forehead smelled just like strawberry Lipsmackers.

Here's an old clip of Miss Velma flying around like the angel she is now in heaven:

Almost Heaven

This is a church down the highway from my sister and brother-in-law's house in West Virginia. Last year it was a strip club and now it's "J.C.'s Hangout."

I don't think I'd sit still for a lap dance or a sermon in there.

Jesus Likes Me, This I Know

...for pop music tells me so...

Thank you, Cinefamily!

Wounded Lion

I was invited to go to see my friend Tim's band The Lamps last night, but I was late to the gig and missed them because I went to see a totally lame bio pic that not only made me want my two hours and $9 back, it made me want to slip Rodger Grossman a hot shot so he'll never make another terrible, terrible movie.

Luckily, Eva and Tim convinced me to stay to see this band, who made me grin from ear to ear. I only wish this video showed how much fun they are to watch live: